LIFE IS BIGGER THAN US FACT BIGGER THAN US AN ISSUES BIGGER THAN NO MAATER WHO YOU ARE PEOPLE

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How to get her phone number

 You spend an hour getting ready to go out. Maybe two, counting travel time. Maybe you review your copy of the Magic Bullets Handbook before you leave. You probably approach a few different women before you find one you really like. You’re about another hour into talking to her when you ask for her phone number….

WAIT!

Don’t screw this part up. You’ve already invested a few hours into your night – and this woman could be your future long-term girlfriend or whatever… or you could screw it all up in about 30 seconds.

Remember these ten rules:

1. The phone number by itself is useless. What’s important is that she wakes up tomorrow wanting you to call. The phone number just gives you a way to do that. Your goal is to make an emotional and physical connection. A phone number is not a goal. Usually if you are making a great connection, she will offer you her number without you even asking for it.

2. Make sure she has your phone number in her phone when you get hers. Not because she’s going to call you (she probably won’t, no matter how much she likes you). But so that when you call or text, she knows who it is. The “oh, hi, who is this?” conversation is a momentum killer, and you know from Magic Bullets how important emotional momentum is.

3. If you ask for her phone number, don’t act like you’re applying for a job or a raise in your allowance. She is not “rewarding” or “granting” you her phone number…think of it like any logistical detail when two people are making plans. Ask for her phone number in the same way you’d ask your friend what time the movie is.

4. Because of this, discuss at least vague plans before getting her phone number. Getting her number so you can “call her sometime” is for teenagers. Get her number so you can let her know about that concert you were talking about going to together.

5. Don’t leave the conversation right after getting her phone number. Why would she want to go to the trouble of seeing you again if you’re too awkward to see her right now? Wait for an emotional high note (leave her wanting more) and leave with a logistical excuse (“I’m ignoring my friends; I should get back to them”)

6. Or even, don’t leave at all, or only temporarily. There’s no rule that says that once you get her phone you can’t go for the “same-night lay”. [If you’re new…same night lays don’t happen by just hanging around her and her group…if you’re new, don’t mess it up with a woman you might be interested in by staying TOO long after getting her number]

7. When you get back to your friends, shut the heck up. Don’t talk about her – your friends will look. You can spoil the best pickup in the world in a split second if she sees your friends cheering you on for getting her number.

8. Don’t keep bumping into each other after the initial phone number. It can get really awkward.

9. On the other hand, don’t worry if she sees you flirting with other women, as long as A/ you’re not getting blown out and B/ it’s not the only thing you’re doing. She’ll probably flirt with other men too – don’t look, don’t compete, don’t worry about it.

10. Don’t call or text her to check if it’s a real number. When guys do this to women I know, even from a different or blocked phone number, somehow they always know.

This is of course only scratching the surface. For the complete guide to getting phone numbers, calling vs text, hundreds of great text messages and conversations, and so on, check out the Ultimate Guide to Phone and Text Game. Some of the chapters you can download right away at no charge, so there’s no reason not to head over there right now.

www.advanceddatingsystems.com/advanced_dating_systems1_005.htm

The Basics of Relationship Management

Relationship management is a crucial topic to improve your long-term success with women. Relationship management is the 7th phase of the Love Systems Emotional Progression model. Relationship management is absolutely crucial, unless all you want out of your relationships with women is drama and one night stands.

Relationship management encompasses everything you do after you sleep with someone, but, like many phases earlier in the model, your success is dependent on the groundwork you'd laid earlier. Just as what you did in comfort influences your chances in seduction, what you did in qualification, comfort, and seduction influence what will be possible in relationship management.

And a lot is possible. Anything from a long-term committed relationship to dating multiple women to friends with benefits; it's all possible if you have the skills and know what to do. Much of what is regarded today as obvious was once highly controversial before I came along. For example:

-You literally never have to lie to get what you want, even if you want to date more than one woman at a time.
-99% of all relationships fall into six major categories. Which pattern your relationship falls into determines where you can go with it.
-Relationship management begins before you even sleep with her the first time.

You have many relationships in your life. You have a professional relationship with your boss, you have a fraternal relationship with your brother, and you probably have a dating or a "friends with benefits" relationship with at least one woman in your life.

So, when we talk about relationships and relationship management, we are assuming that you and a woman are boyfriend-girlfriend. Relationship management refers to the frame in which you and a woman are interacting.

Relationship management begins well before you sleep with her, but most of the important work comes after. Commonly, men only start thinking about relationship management after sex is over: "I slept with her; what do I do now?" It's a rookie mistake to leave it so long, because a little bit of work to set the frame during comfort goes a long way afterward. But we'll cover this later.

For now, let's start by looking at some of the basic relationship types:

Traditional: One boy, one girl, no one dates anyone else.

Traditional Plus: Like traditional, but sometimes you involve other people in your sex life (not your emotional life). Usually this is when both you and her enjoy threesomes with other women.

Open: Your primary emotional commitment is to each other, but you are both free to date other people. Open relationships vary in intensity: some are much like Traditional Plus relationships while others are far more casual.

Multiple: You have a strong commitment to each other, but nothing theoretically limits what you can do with others.

Dating / Undefined: The rules of what you're doing and where you're going are unclear, but there is no explicit commitment. Often early in your relationship and usually the case before you sleep together.

Friends with Benefits: No significant emotional commitment. Relationship is primarily sexual.

As you can probably see, these relationship types are ranked in decreasing order of commitment. Drilling down, we see that there are pretty clear distinctions between the types, in which you are #1 to each other, the middle two, in which this may be more ambiguous, and the lower two, in which there should be no expectations at all. For simplicity's sake, we will call these three groups High Commitment, Medium Commitment, and Low Commitment.

What you seek is a matter of preference. There is nothing inherently superior about one relationship goal over another. It depends on your desires, her desires, where you are in your life, and all kinds of other factors.

That being said, I'm fully aware when writing this that many of you are going to skip straight to the Multiple Relationships section. That's fine if that's what you truly want. But pause for a second and truly consider things. Don't just want something because it feels socially impressive or some of the top Pickup Artists in the world want it. It's a lot more work than it seems. Many of the top names in the "Seduction Community" have never pulled this off successfully, despite their marketing propaganda.

Whatever your relationship goals, there are some key points to keep in mind:

The type of relationship you have with a woman can and usually will change over time. In general, it's easiest to move within a given Commitment level (from "Multiple" to "Open" Relationship or from "Dating/Undefined" to "Friends with Benefits" for example). Moving between Commitment levels is much harder. You can sometimes move up, but rarely down. Moving down usually requires a breakup first, and a period of no relationship. After that, you can try to re-establish a relationship, but often all you will be able to get is Friends with Benefits. This happens between ex-boyfriends and ex-girlfriends more than many people think.

While you can get away with trying to move to your desired relationship type after you've already had sex with her, this compromises your effectiveness in a couple of ways. For one thing, if she gets the sense that you don't have much of an idea about what it is that you want, this could turn her off and you'll never get to sex in the first place. In addition, you will be far more effective at bringing her to your desired relationship type if you are able to implicitly set the right expectations in advance. It's not like she won't think about it just because you're not giving her anything to go on. She'll think about it anyway, and she'll let her conclusions be driven by her own assumptions and preferences. These will be a lot harder to change later.

It's a cliche, but communication is key to a relationship. It's not enough to act like you're in a specific kind of relationship with someone; it must be communicated and agreed on by both of you, whether explicitly or implicitly. Again, playing the "ambiguity game" won't help you much. Women want to know what's going on. If you don't make an effort to communicate this somehow, even indirectly, she'll try to interpret (or end up misinterpreting) what you do communicate and you may well end up with differing ideas about where your relationship is going. Do I need to tell you that this is a bad idea?

Armed with these general rules, let's talk about each of the six major relationship types...

This is just the tip of the iceberg, but I go on in my DVD how to analyze each of the relationship types from the standpoint of what it's really like (pluses and minuses), how do you get there, and how to make sure it succeeds. All these topics and more are also covered in the Relationship Management DVD.

www.advanceddatingsystems.com/advanced_dating_systems1_008

Being Humorous And Making Women Laugh Is A Science

You should know that humor is important for dating and laughter can swiftly open up a woman's heart. Whenever your interaction with a woman is a bit flat or if you happen to be in a difficult or embarrassing situation, you can always use humor to boost the dynamics or diffuse the tension.

And humor is a common trait of men who are good with women. It demonstrates confidence, a light outlook on life and the ability to have fun (together with others).

Unfortunately, not every man can be said to be humorous.

Sure, almost any man can crack a joke or two, but not every man can do it with consistency and make any woman laugh at any time, any place? Even worse, there's a common misconception claiming that humor is quality for a small group of "gifted" man. Some men think "I'm just not born to be a funny guy. What can I possibly do?"

But the fact is, the "sense" of humor CAN be acquired through learning and practicing. Making women laugh is a science, because human beings' reactions to different types of "humor stimuli" are predictable, and there are tested-and-proven methods to match a piece of humor with a subject's education, personality, and cultural background to induce laughter.

Any man -- regardless of looks, intelligence, wealth, education, personality, cultural background, location, etc. -- can unleash his power of humor to make women laugh and fall in love. And it doesn't matter if you already have a good sense of humor, or if you frequently get "caught off guard" when certain dating situations demand funny and smart responses.

So here's the good news: Renowned dating coach Martin Merrill has specifically designed a course to train men how to be more humorous in dating. If you would like to be empowered with the ability to make any woman laugh at any time and any place, then you've got to check out this course. You can find out more by clicking on the following link:

www.advanceddatingsystems.com/advanced­_dating_systems1_003.htm

How to be cool: From Boring to Funny to Sexy

Hey gang.

 I used to read all the time about how women wanted a guy with a good sense of humor. It was in every magazine, every talk show...even my female friends would tell me the exact same thing. Even the Magic Bullets Handbook said so, and Magic Bullets is well-known for contradicting conventional wisdom (and being right).

You'd think that a professional comedian such as myself would have no problem with women then, right? Wrong. After years of dating disappointments I signed up for my Love Systems Bootcamp and got to work building my life the right way.

I noticed instantly some things that I was already doing right (thanks to my improv and standup training), but some other things that I had WAY wrong. I want to talk to you guys about one of those things right now.

Going from funny to sexy. Why is it that so many really funny comedians have so much trouble hooking up with high quality women? How to you go from being the funny guy to the guy she wants to take home?

The answer is to use humor to mask your sexual intent. That means bringing up the topic of sex, but in a funny way.

You should always be looking for opportunities to bring up the topic of sex with a woman that you are interested in, even though it can be hard to find a way to make it not creepy. When you talk about sex, you subcommunicate that you are someone who is interested in sex, who has had sex before, who is confident about sex. You start to paint the picture that sex is a normal and important part of your life.

You also start to introduce the idea of sex with the woman you're talking to, which is really important, especially if you want same night lays. She'll have a hard time putting you in the friend zone if you've already brought up the idea of hooking up with her.

Not only that, but if done in the right way, simply talking about sex can be physically exciting to her. It is a huge tool in breaking though levels of intimacy.

So how do we do this without sounding like a total creeper? The answer is above. USE HUMOR!

One of the things I've noticed from having done hundreds of approaches is that you can get away with a lot if you are funny. Knowing this, you should always start your sexual framing in a way that's funny.

Two Techniques for Funny Sexual Framing

There are literally hundreds of ways to work sex into conversation, but for the moment I'll hit you with two that are super easy.

The first is to hide it in a role play. A role play is putting you and the woman in a fake scenario that she can play along with. For example, pretending that you are breaking up even though you just met:

"I'm totally breaking up with you. I'll come over tomorrow to get my CD's and for the breakup sex."

You can even pretend that you've been married and add all sorts of crazy fake details:

"That's it! You and I are getting a divorce. Just as well. You could never handle me in bed anyways."

Once you have the fake scenario out there, you've got free reign over the kind of material you can make up. Why not make up something sexual?

The second technique has to do with one of my Disqualification types. One of my personal techniques is called Raising Your Value, in which you boast about your positive qualities. You talk about how attractive you are, how cool you are, and most importantly, how sure you are that the woman you are talking to you is attracted to you:

"You're such a sexual predator. I can feel you undressing me with your eyes right now!"

or

"I'd appreciate it if you'd get your mind out of the gutter. I know it's hard because I'm so hot, but just do your best and think unsexy thoughts."

In both of the above techniques, even though it's just a joke, it still breaks through those same levels of intimacy. It has the same effect, even though it's just a joke!

The above tools are a good place to start, but it really is just the tip of the iceberg. For example, did you know that these sexual jokes are a perfect opportunity to escalate physically? Just throw it into the joke! Why not have the fake breakup conversation with her sitting on your lap? Why not give her a friendly hug then accuse her of copping a feel? The possibilities are limitless if you're looking in the right places.

Of course they have to be in on the joke for this to work, so make sure you get on the same page with them as soon as possible.

There are a lot more ways to turn things sexual, which you can find in the Magic Bullets Handbook. I would highly recommend it to you if you are clueless on turning conversations a little more sexual.Check it out here: www.advanceddatingsystems.com/advanced_dating_systems1_002

 MacGAME10

How To Avoid Being 'Just Friends' With Women

The worst case scenario that can happen when you want to date a woman is when she says "you know, you're a really nice guy ... but let's rather be friends ok?" Doesn't that suck? Of course it does, but for many guys out there they just don't know how to overcome this problem. But I do so listen up... When you act like a clingy, needy nice-guy around women then you are not getting anywhere. She will not see you as a potential boyfriend or lover but as a friend. Why? Because you did not stimulate her emotional trigger buttons ... the ones that make her feel that gut level emotion called sexual attraction towards you. Here's what happens when you behave like a wimp or nicey-nice guy around women: they tell you that you are indeed a nice person, but they would rather be friends with you because you are so nice and cute. I know, it doesn't really make any sense at all if you are new to this, but here's what's REALLY going on inside her head: They really don't want to be friends...they just want to get rid of you! Now look, women say and mean very different things. "Let’s be friends" or "I don't want to lose you as a friend" just means, "You know, I can't really see a relationship working out" or in many cases "I'm just not attracted to you sexually". So how do you make a woman attracted to you? How do you make a woman see you as a hot stud and as boyfriend material instead of just another girlfriend? Allright...first of all, when you want to get a woman's phone number or take things to another level on a date...just stop acting like one of her friends would. Seriously, if you don't want to become her friend then STOP acting like one in the first place! All of her friends are nice to her, pay her lots of compliments, treat her like a princess and buy her drinks when she is out. If you do exactly the same, then she will put you in the FRIENDS category like all the other guys. Don't become her personal slave that does everything for her and offers to help her out all the time. Don't spend hours listening to all her problems. You want to be the one she talks for hours to all her girlfriends about because she isn't sure how she can attract you. But if you act like a friend, then you will become her friend. This is what I want you to do now: you need to do the exact opposite of what her friends do...

http://www.advanceddatingsystems.com/

MacGAME10

5 TURN OFFS FOR WOMEN

Improving your dating life can be tough, especially when women reject you on the approach. It's part of the game. If you are getting striked out after the approach you might be doing something wrong that turns women off. It can be a lot of different things and you might be even unaware of the mistakes you are making. Here are 5 things to watch for that turn women off (and you want to avoid).

1. Pickup lines

Let's get one thing clear before you even approach: pickup lines do not work. Whenever you approach a woman with a (cheesy) pickup line, she will shoot you down. By using a pickup line, what you are actually saying to her is that you are someone who doesn't have any social intuition and you are someone who does not date women like her. Communicating those things automatically raises a red flag in her mind that you are not suitable for her to date you.

It's even better to just say "Hi I'm Ben. What's your name?"... and go from there. Avoid pickup lines.

On the other hand, there are good conversation starters (or openers as some people call them). The goal of a conversation starter is to start a conversation; nothing more, nothing less. Once you have initiated the conversation, you need to engage her into an interesting conversation to build attraction and go from there (which I cover in depth in my book Magic Bullets).

2. Awkwardness

First one is easy: awkwardness. Women avoid awkwardness like men avoid grenades in their vicinity. It's that bad. Common things that cause awkwardness include: long pauses in conversation and acting goofy in public with her. Like my fellow dating coach Future would say, "awkwardness is one of the kryptonites of attraction." Awkwardness will kill any attraction she might feel for you so avoid it at all costs.

3. Boring

Women love interesting men and excitement. Being boring is on the opposite side of that spectrum and no woman wants to be around a boring guy. The task is simple; avoid being boring. If you can do that, you are already way ahead of most guys. One common mistake is asking multiple questions in a row. Do not ask multiple questions in a row. That's a job interview. Keep the conversation "light." Do not discuss the existence of god or which political affiliation you're part of. In simple terms: less logic, more emotions. Try to tease her like you would to your little sister or niece, tell some jokes, and share stories.

4. Neediness

Neediness is solely doing something for someone else to get affection or love in return. Being needy shows you have no options when it comes to women. It is conveyed mostly through your actions, but also through your words. Examples of being needy:

-calling or texting multiple times a day
-you are too available
-you try to please her all the time (at your own expense)

Here's a key insight to female psychology: women like men who are desired by other women. It's like a shortcut for them to filter out men. If other women like him, there must be something good about him she is not aware of. Showing neediness is the exactly the opposite and will kill any attraction (another one of those kryptonites).

5. Bragging

Bragging about yourself is like screaming "look how insecure I am and I'm trying to impress you." A rich man doesn't talk about how rich he is and Hugh Hefner does not talk about many blonds he has slept with. Subtlety is the key to showing off the cool things about you. The more subtle you are about the attractive things of you, the better it comes across to women. They are very good at filling in the blanks and recognizing subtle elements in your stories, outfits, and possessions.

For example, instead of saying "A couple weeks ago I had a girl, who is really beautiful and a model, come over and have diner with me. She made the best pasta ever and it was delicious" you want to be more subtle. A simpler and more subtle version is, "A friend of mine came over to cook for pasta for me and it was the best pasta I have ever had." The latter is very subtle and conveying that you have other women in your life. Do guys generally come over and cook? No, women do. Women will understand that a woman was there for you to cook. The context is unknown, but she can fill in the blanks that is was possibly a date or maybe even your ex-girlfriend. Who knows, but you conveyed the same info in a shorter and more subtle way.

Avoid all those turn offs and your dating life will be changed up-side down. Sometimes dating does not have to be that difficult when you know what to do AND what not to do. In my book Magic Bullets I go over in more details what turns women off, but more importantly what turns them on. Click here to find out more about it.

http://www.advanceddatingsystems.com/

MacGAME10